My Story: A Growing Disdain for Mediocrity (Chapter 1)

Self knowledge, self love and self expression
Sipping on a cappuccino and journalling somewhere in Rome, Italy

I started writing a bio for this old Wordpress site a few days ago and what was initially intended to be a short summation of who I was, became this cathartic, therapeutic writing session. So for those who care to read about some highlights of my journey that have shaped who I am today, please read on.

Personally, the awareness of my own story revealed and confirmed some of my value systems and personal philosophy which I thought was pretty cool. I truly believe there is tremendous power in accepting and seeking to understand our own story.

This is a “My Story” series dedicated to what came up for me. A story about my personal transformation as a result of expanding and deepening my levels of self-knowledge and self-love.

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Growing up I was the eldest of three with a younger brother and sister. My mother told me that as a baby nothing could hold me down. I broke multiple strollers, magically escaped from playpens and jumped out of cribs when I was only one or two years old. I guess I never really liked being boxed or strapped in. A desire for freedom was there from the outset.

When I was young I was the good one. I always believed I had the potential to be anything I wanted but it wasn’t until my late teens/early twenties that I remembered that.

My whole life I was really great at doing what I was told and following the rules. I got good grades my whole life and pretty much followed the herd all the way to university. As I look back I can’t even recognize that person anymore. My thoughts, words and actions were coming from a place of seeking acceptance, wanting approval and the expectations of my parents.

Although I wasn’t conscious of this inconsistency it eventually began to manifest into my life as I grew in self awareness.

In 2004, I started working for a major car manufacturer where I was eventually earning $35 an hour at only 19-20 years old! I thought I hit the jackpot! Who else my age was earning that type of money while in university? Even people twice my age would kill for that type of money!

So there I was. I got a sneak peak at the real world. I was raised in a middle class family and like most people believed that money solved life’s problems. Boy, was I ever wrong. I met some great, positive people at that factory… but they were far and few between. The vast majority of them were more like zombies.

Go to work. Do their time. Complain about mediocre things. Go home. Watch television. Go to bed. Wake up and start all over again. It reminded me of watching a television show on repeat. Even more so, it made me think of being in a type of prison. A self-imposed prison.

“Something is horribly wrong,” I thought to myself. Everything I thought about how the world works suddenly started falling apart.

I was able to easily project what my life would be like if I continued on this path and let’s just say I didn’t like what I saw. After years of riding the socially accepted path through life, it’s like something that was asleep inside me suddenly awoke. I knew deep in my gut that this path was not right for me and decided I would not settle for the cookie cutter path of the herd. I decided to take the proverbial fork in the road in search of something better!

This new awareness made me question everything! I became curious for what felt like the first time in my life. What I learned was that I worked along side people with diploma’s, degrees, even PhD’s and MBA’s! The only thing keeping them on that factory line was, yes you got it – money.

Regardless of their education, ambitions and passions they made lifestyle choices based strictly on money as their motivation. Now don’t get me wrong. I am not against money one bit. It represents the value we create and deliver to the marketplace and it allows access to more options in life. But deep inside I knew there is more to life than that.

I was seeking my own sense of significance, meaning and way of contributing to this world. This led me to seeking new information and wisdom outside of the mainstream. I became obsessively interested in the books I brought home from the bookstore rather than the mandatory texts at school. Personal growth, philosophy, spirituality, economics, real estate, investing, sales, entrepreneurship – whatever I could get my hands on!

I discovered I actually loved to learn! This self-motivated desire to learn in comparison to my complete disregard for the mandatory and boring material at school was a huge contrast for me. I was crushing a book a week that year! This was the critical mass and turning point in my life.

I remembered, nay — I embraced the fact that I had the potential to be, do and have whatever I want simply because I want it. I realized I deserved what I truly want regardless of what others think. I was finally beginning to rediscover and redefine who I was.

I was ready to begin the first step on an unbeaten path.

To be continued….

Coming next… “The Fat Chronicles” of Oliver at 40 LBS overweight and Rediscovering Entrepreneurship

2 Comments

  1. Andrew C. MacDonald February 24, 2013 at 10:24

    I can definitely identify with a lot of your story thus far, looking forward to the rest of your series!

  2. Pingback: My Story: A Super-Sized Version of Me (Chapter 2) | The Blog of Oliver Manalese

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